The more I read and the more I learn it seems living intentionally is at the core of this healing journey. Mastering regulating our bodies so we spend less time triggered and activated, more time reflecting on who we are and wish to continue becoming. Here are some tips I think may be helpful:
1. Relax your body. The more we face triggers in a regulated/relaxed state- the more powerful and grounded we become and the more we reclaim our life. Similarly, in the event of emergencies, it’s important we stay calm. Staying calm helps us to be our fastest, strongest, smartest self. Relax your body as often as you can for good practice. Some of my previous posts have examples on how we can regulate/relax our bodies…but if you already know something that has worked for you in the past- start there!
2. Practice intentional language. What we say about ourselves is pervasive. It’s imperative we speak with compassion, gentleness, assertion, and love.
3. Articulate the principles important to you. What are some principles you have or have been passed down to you that you appreciate and hold close to your heart?
4. Reflect on where you’re in breach of these principles. Who do you want to be in stressful, triggering situations? What stops you from being that person? What are some things you can do more/less of to move you toward the vision of yourself you see in you. Dialogue with yourself about this.
5. Continue to reflect on societal/systemic internalized messages. This is critical. Whether we are in a place of privilege or not- we all will internalize the messages we grow up around or are told to us. Most of my clients (whom are Latinx/ BIPOC) talk about the internalized messages of not being good enough. Systemic racism is one of the most painful, helpless, enraging experiences. Racial disparities are a thing. Let us never ignore. What’s our role in it? Have we internalized intolerance? Have we internalized racism? Internalized xenophobia? Internalized homophobia? Checking ourselves is part of healing systemically.
6. Remember yourself too. Always. The work is hard. It’s like riding a backwards bicycle. Our procedural memory knows how to ride a bike because it’s learned behavior..but to unlearn and teach a new skill can be trying. Try anyway. Do anyway. Remember you, you are the most important person in your life (or my wish is that you one day will be). Give yourself a part of you, just for you.
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